Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall...Who’s the Fattest of Them All?!?

Why the Queen in ‘Snow White’ never asked this question instead, I may never know, but it is a sentiment that anyone struggling with their weight has coped with. The mirror can either be your best friend or your starkest enemy (personally, my mirror was my BFF last Thursday, and has been a bit of a b%@!h to me this week). Now I know that many of you who have never struggled with your weight do not understand this concept, but the mirror mine-as-well be as dreaded as the (dun, dun, dun) SCALE!

Allow me to explain…while maintaining or losing weight, one is very in tune with their body. Almost every time I step on the scale I know exactly what it is going to say. If I’m feeling and looking a bit heavier-the number is up, and when I’m thinking I’m the skinniest girl next to Barbie [excuse the obvious exaggeration ;) ] -the number tends to be lower. The knowledge of my body accompanied with my fair weathered friend, the mirror, seems to always dictate what I am going to see on the scale. When you think about it, it really isn’t rocket science after all…

However, there is a much more complicated mirror that exists out there-other people! No, I am not referring to what other people think about your weight loss. Rather, if you have lost a good amount of weight it is hard to place your body in relation to friends, family, or hell, even public in general! You tend to always think that you are one of the ‘bigger and fluffier’ people in the room, but in actuality, you probably aren't  anymore…

I find this ‘mirror’ of trying to figure out how big you are in comparison to others very difficult. Now, once again, those of you who have never had to lose weight probably are thinking-why does it matter what your body is like in comparison to others, you should love who you are and how far you’ve come? In actuality this ‘hippie’, ‘granola’, and ‘zen’ like sappiness is true, but if you had a point in your life where you were always conscious of being one of the biggest (if not the biggest) person in the room…then you would understand the need to try to figure out what size your body is in comparison to others now that your extra LBS have been served their eviction notice!

Trying to find where you belong is a form of self-assurance and is a way to seek a bit of inner affirmation that your hard work really is paying off! People who were once heavy always have a feeling that we could lose ‘a few more lbs,’ but in reality (reality in weight loss…never heard of it haha) that may not be the case. Why is it that most people who have always been a size 8 are more content and comfortable with being a size 8 than someone who has fought to be a size 8? Shouldn't I as a fairly newcomer to a size 8 be able to comfortably enjoy it as much as the person with size 8 seniority? Finding this comfort is much easier said than done…I am still trying to find comfort in my size 8 jeans...and my size 8 life.

We always want to be able to say, “I’m finally as skinny as [insert name of your skinny, beautiful, popular friend here] is…”, but somehow, we are never actually able to admit that we ARE as skinny as she is when we get there! I may borrow a pair of jeans from my friend and have them fit perfectly but I will still think she is skinnier than me. It is the dreaded mirror of weight loss that does this to me! I try to battle this by reflecting on my accomplishments often, staying on track (makes you feel better about your body) and trying to think about my new size rationally among my friends (rationality-another thing that doesn't exist in weight loss haha). Some days this works, and some days it doesn't, but overall the goal is to find genuine comfort in my new size and my new 'place' among my loved ones... 

It is very clear that the real mirror we fight is our heads… With this said however, I vow that one day I will concur both the mirror on the wall and the one in my head; either that, or I’ll break that god damned mirror and have 7 years of back luck…who wants that?

How do you all cope with finding your place within the ‘mirror’ of friends/family who have always been smaller than you, but are now around the same size?

Until next time, keeping the bulge at bay!

PS-Here is a website where you enter your height, weight, pant/shirt size, and body type to see other people who meet the same profile…it is a great tool to mentally place your body in relation to others! http://www.mybodygallery.com/photos-8959-body-shape.htm