Welcome to 'Keeping the Bulge at Bay'
This blog is designed to discuss the hardest part of losing weight...keeping it off! To understand my story and what my reasons are for creating this blog, please follow this link to my first post: "The REAL Beginning..." It's raw, real, and honest.
Hope you enjoy reading my posts, and please feel free to leave any feedback you may have!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

The REAL Beginning...

This may seem odd, or even trite, but I decided I need to start a blog! There are so many blogs that exist about people documenting their trials and tribulations down the path of MOST resistance-weight loss; but I've been pondering the thought: are there really many blogs that exist which document what is said to be (and IS) the most difficult part of weight loss...maintaining it!

To explain a bit further as to why I am doing this...at my heaviest I weighed over 260 pounds (I have never really admitted that number to anyone before)! In fact, I weighed so much that at one point I remember contemplating the thought *if I just gain 20 more pounds then I can qualify for gastro-bypass surgery and the FAT will just mellllllt awaayyyy!* I don't remember what exactly made me decide to lose the weight but there were enough reasons that existed as to why I should.

In gym class I ran a 21 minute mile (everyone was already done and playing tennis while I and one other girl finished), I was the fattest one of all my friends-by a large margin (pun intended), no guys were interested in me at all, not one of my senior portraits did I want to put into the yearbook, and honestly-having that much weight on you makes you feel like S#!%! Therefore, I decided that I had to make some changes. They were very small at first, and increased when I was ready. In looking back at pictures of myself from those old fat days, back then I never thought I was as fat as I actually was-a blessing in disguise I suppose...

Something interesting that I believe many people trying to get rid of the bulge do is: you document your life's milestones in pounds not feelings (note I'm a bit under 5' 10'')...
  • 2003-2004-sophomore and junior year in high school-heaviest ever 260...
  • 2005-high school graduation 230...
  • 2006-end of freshmen year of college 211...
  • 2007-studying abroad 190....
  • 2008-camp counselor at a summer camp for international students (first summer) 180....
  • Jan-2009 returning from the Dominican Republic and joining Weight Watchers 204...
  • May-2009 graduating college 174...
  • Nov-2009 meeting my fiance, Mike 164...
  • May-2011 walking in my Master's graduation ceremony 160...
  • Aug-2011 getting my first 'real' job and moving in with my fiance 164...
  • 2012 starting my at home workout videos (something I had never done before!) 158...
  • TODAY: 152
  • UPDATE: as of 7/31 149/150
In looking at those numbers, people will see three things that I genuinely believe ring true for those that struggle with their weight.

First, it can and usually does, take a long time to loose the weight. When I tell people that I have lost over 100 lbs they constantly ask me, "Oh my god, that's amazing-how long have you been doing it?" It's as if I'm supposed to say-well, I'm more amazing then the Biggest Loser contestants and I lost 100 pounds in one  month! Instead of conjuring up a sarcastic and diabolical lie such as that, I always respond by saying "it's over a few years." But to tell them the truth, that I've struggled with the battle of the bulge for over 7 years, is a hard pill to swallow-something in fact I have not swallowed until this very moment (thanks to my little handy-dandy timeline above-can't ignore it when it's in black and white)! Weight loss can take a long time, and if you want others to understand that-you must first understand it yourself.

Second, the number doesn't always go in that southern direction you are hoping and are working so desperately for. There were times in between these milestones in life that I was 'Yo-Yo-ing' up and down in the same 8-10 pound range for what seemed like years. In fact, since I met my fiance in late 2009, I have been Yo-Yo-ing (or as I prefer to call it, maintaining) around that same range for years-literally!

And lastly, third, one does not lose the same numbers when they weigh 170 that they did when they weighed 230. When I look at a scale these days and I only lose .2 of a pound it sends literal shivers up my spine because I have a need to see BIG numbers. I want more of those times where I lost 5 or 7 pounds in a WEEK to feel like I have truly accomplished something! Proportionally though, my body is not going to lose the numbers it used to-but believe it or not, this is one of the hardest things in adapting to losing major amounts of weight. It ties into the whole mind-game that exists in losing the big L-B's. The mind-game of weight loss is enough for at least two or three separate blog posts haha...But I try to remember that even when I stay the same and don't lose one freaken ounce, that if nothing else, I should count that as 2 lbs that I didn't gain!

So with ALL of this being said, I want to conclude my introduction post with what this blog is and is not. I do not believe that my opinions from my own weight loss journey (or life in general where it may apply) are what all people struggling with their weight go through. Everyone is different, and their experiences are even more different than they are.

Also, as stated in the first few sentences, there are a ton of blogs out there documenting people's weight loss journeys. They are each different in their own right, and document their journey accordingly. Admittedly, I can't write about the struggles with keeping the bulge at bay without touching upon the process of getting here (or there, since there are a few more pounds to go). But with this being said, I want this blog to concentrate on just that-keeping the bulge at bay! I truly believe maintaining is harder than losing, and that is what I will explore! Feel free to agree, disagree, discuss, and share. Hell, I just admitted my actual current weight to the world-hope my Dr. doesn't feel slighted since she was the one trusted soul with that CONFIDENTIAL information before now ;)

So, just like that, let the NEXT journey begin...keeping that damn bulge at bay!

23 comments:

  1. Amazing! I love your honesty and the view point of this blog which is true, not many people document that part at all but it's the most important part of weight loss!! Good luck!!!!

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  2. This blog is just what I need. I too am 5'10 and have gone from 255 to a now 162. I'm still working toward 150, but your blog is a great inspiration. Thanks for sharing!

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    1. I was at 162 for what felt like was forever! It was a tough number to get past but if I can do it, you definitely can too! :)

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  3. Thank you! This is awesome! I love this, I also struggle with my weight, in a constant battle. Your a smart lady! Thank you for the inspiration!

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    1. Thank you for your kind words and for reading the blog! It truly is a daily battle that only people who struggle with it fully understand-thanks again for reading!

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  4. I'm a new follower!!!! Great job girl, you look fabulous!!!

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  5. Great work, Rachel! I know we haven't seen each other/spoken much since I left Connecticut, but I just wanted to say it's very brave to put this all out there for everyone to see. Keep it up!

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    1. Thanks, Lindsay! That is so kind of you to say! It took me awhile to muster up the guts to do it, but I'm very happy I did-people have been wonderfully receptive of it...thank you so much again! I hope all is going fabulously for you! :)

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  6. Seeing this blog gives me hope for the future. My experience is very different but I am in that yo-yo stage. I know I have to keep pushing myself but the hard thing for me is, I used to be an extreme athlete but since high-school I've slowly let myself go and now (for me) the hardest part is realizing I can't do what I used to be able to do. I know all about those mind-games. I wish you much luck and I will be following to give encouragement!

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    1. Hi Gwen!
      Thank you so much for taking time to read the blog! I can absolutely see how that can be frustrating and can play mind-games with you! Just know however, deep down inside you is still that athlete and this will help you lose the weight faster than most other people who never were athletic (like me haha). I'm always jealous of people I see who lose weight more efficiently because they have that athletic core to tap into. I promise your strong core is still in there...once your body allows you to fully tap into it there will be no stopping you! Good luck and keep in touch!

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  7. Hi. I've lost 175 lbs over about 2 years and have been maintaining for 7 months now. I also find this to be the hardest part. I finally figured out how to lose weight, but transitioning to maintenance has been a struggle. I also find there really isn't any support out there for people who have lost a lot of weight. Lots of people are trying to lose weight and there are tons of boards and groups where you can support each other. But very little for people who have been successful and are now maintaining. Especially those of us who have lost a significant (100+ lbs) amount of weight.

    Good luck to you on your journey!

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    1. Hi Michelle,
      Thank you for reading and congratulations on your loss-what an achievement! Even more congratulations for maintaining it! The reason I started this blog was to give support to people like you and I who have lost weight and are trying hard to maintain it...it's a whole new mindset to obtain and not many people fully comprehend what it's like! If we all stick together we will definitely succeed :)
      Good luck on your journey, and please keep in touch, I would love to know how it continues to go!

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  8. Fantastic! This has been my life forever. I am close to your age and I swear it never gets easier to maintain and even frustratingly harder when your weight yo-yos. Thank you for the motivating and honest words. Thank you for writing this blog and the humor is refreshing!

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    1. Thank you so much for reading...you are right, it never gets easier to maintain-but we have to do it right? Feel free to share any of your experiences or tips for success :) Thanks again for reading!

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  9. Your post was so refreshing. So often I get sent the message that once people start loosing weight they have dramatic results. My experience has been slower...often hitting a wall where I have to peel back the layers and figure out what is keeping me from moving forward. Your post was just what I needed to hear. I have been feeling discouraged and like I should be getting all this faster! I think that kind of thinking really dis-enables me from taking this journey and learning how to rewrite my relationship with food. Thank you!

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    1. Hi Tovah!
      Thank you so much for reading the blog and I'm glad you liked it. I feel as though there is a 'rumor' out there making people feel as though if they don't lose the weight in a few months or even a year than they are doing something wrong...but that 'rumor' is WRONG! It takes time and dedication. No one can do it for you but if you want it bad enough you WILL succeed! I like the saying I heard 'the longer it takes to come off, the longer it will stay off!' You're taking the time to rewrite your relationship with food and truly transform your life into a maintainable lifestyle-and congratulations on doing that-many people don't, and they gain the weight back right after goal! This is actually going to be a topic of an upcoming post so stay tuned for it!
      Keep in touch, I would love to hear more about your progress!
      Thanks again for reading! :)

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  10. I am at my heaviest I've ever been right now..over 260 and I feel absolutely no hope of ever getting to my goal weight of 160. I am 5'8 and am considered morbidly obese at age 29..makes me feel horrible about myself. Reading your blog gives me some inspiration to hopefully get my mind and my body where I need it to be.

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    1. You will get there! I know exactly how you feel but you have the power to get there. Start with baby steps if necessary and make changes slowly so they stick! Trying to change your entire lifestyle isn't easy to maintain at one time but slow little steps lead to long term success. If you ever need any advice or words of encouragement feel free to drop me an email :) keepingthebulgeatbay@yahoo.com Keep us all posted on your progress!! :)

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  11. I just came across your blog and I'm glad I did! You have such a great story and it will be nice to follow someone that is maintaining.

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  12. I just found your blog through pinterest! You are definitely an inspiration. I love your honestly and point of view for your blog. Keeping the weight off is definitely hard, probably the hardest thing for me as I gained weight back already. I am 5'8 almost 22 and hope to get down to a what I have been told is a healthy weight of around 140. I am currently at 190. Got a bit to go. I was at my lowest in the past few years 173 I think. And the highest when I started college at 210 I think (I never checked by comparing pictures from then to now I'm assuming that's what I was). But the stress of college and lack of time made my best friend fast food. Not a great excuse, but I'm on summer break until September so I'm hoping to get my butt back in gear and work hard on my weight loss goal. What do you think was the best thing for you to do to really help you get the weight off and maintain it? Do you write down what you eat? Regular work out? Stop eating certain things? Honestly any advice would help, it means a lot more coming from a real person who has gone the same trial then an infomercial from someone who "lost 50 pounds" (but more than likely was never really overweight). I look forward to hearing from you. You are an inspiration and a beautiful woman!

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    1. Hi Kate!
      First, thank you so much for reading!
      Finding what works is different for everyone but I have always felt that if being healthy feels like too much work I likely won't do it. Now don't get me wrong, losing and maintaining weight is a lot of work but there are certain aspects that feel like extra work that I just simply don't want to do haha. For example, for me, I have never tracked (written down) what I've eaten. I am able to keep track of it in my head and that works for me perfectly-writing it down feels like a job and isn't fun for me. Also, I work out when I can and as often as I can but I don't get mad at myself if I happen to miss a workout-it is what it is haha (But when I was consciously trying to lose weight I was much more strict with my work outs then I am now...)
      My biggest piece of advice is to learn what your work out and eating habits are (for example, learn your trigger foods-check out the trigger food post I did awhile back). If you consciously see what you're habits are then it is easier to make the changes.
      Also, after I lost my first 60 lbs by myself, I hit a plateau and decided to join Weight Watchers. I am a huge proponent of WW because they help you rework your eating habits with a TON of social support from people who understand and more importantly can RELATE!! If you ever need some moral support or have any questions, please feel free to email me at keepingthebulgeatbay@yahoo.com I have been exactly where you are and know how it is at every stage of weight loss so feel free to send me a message any time :)
      Keep us all updated on your progress-you CAN DO THIS! Thanks again for reading!!
      Rachel :)

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